The last nickle

[jorgeinmiami]

The Last Nickel:
A father walks into a restaurant with his young son. He gives the young boy 3 nickels to play with to keep him occupied.

Suddenly, the boy starts choking and going blue in the face.. The father realizes the boy has swallowed the nickels and starts slapping him on the back. The boy coughs up 2 of the nickels, but keeps choking.

Looking at his son, the father is panicking, shouting for help.

A well dressed, attractive, and serious looking woman, in a blue
business suit, is sitting at a coffee bar reading a newspaper and
sipping a cup of coffee. At the sound of the commotion, she looks up, puts her coffee cup down, neatly folds the newspaper, and places it on the counter, gets up from her seat and makes her way, unhurried, across the restaurant.

Reaching the boy, the woman carefully drops his pants, takes hold of the boy's testicles, and starts to squeeze and twist, gently at first, and then ever so firmly. After a few seconds the boy convulses violently and coughs up the last nickel, which the woman deftly catches in her free hand.

Releasing the boy's testicles, the woman hands the nickel to the father and walks back to her seat at the coffee bar without saying a word.

As soon as he is sure that his son has suffered no ill effects, the
Father rushes over to the woman and starts thanking her saying, "I've never seen anybody do anything like that before, it was fantastic. Are you a doctor?"

'No,' the woman replied. 'I'm with the IRS.'

[SteveH]

funny !! enjoyed it.

[strick]

Funny but true. Being self employed I have had to deal with an audit before.

Capt Chuck sent me a good on the other day.

strick

[cdavisdb]

Good story, I agree.

An AUDIT, foul word, fouler experience, and mine was a "good" one.

I spent painful months and hundreds of hours preparing for the miserable thing. Went over and memorized every damn piece of paper I had for that year. Went in with all the paper and a written list of what they could find, good and bad. It amounted to small change. I sat in the IRS office and watched the examiner as she looked over the paperwork she had, never even asking for mine. Finally she snorted in disgust and said, with some venom "You should not be here. I'm going to fix it so you can't come back for a long time." Struck me as a tough lady. I don't know what she did, but I've not been audited in near 20 years since, knock wood.

[BigLew]

Got a letter notifying me of an audit. Called my accountant and he reviewed the submission and accompanied me to the audit. Questions were answered and I received a letter of "acceptance as submitted"! I sent the IRS a bill for my time & expenses, and my accountant's bill. Got a phone call from the IRS asking what the bill was about. Told them their inquiry was inappropriate and that my submission was accepted as originally submitted and asked them who they expected to pay the costs of their mistake. The told me my costs were tax deductible!

My accountant was told to get the costs back and then some and I have never been audited again!